FUCK EBAY; FUCK LA;
OR VICE VERSA!!
In either the spirit of Andy Kaufman or the interest of humanity or whoever, I would like to offer this holiday gift to all mankind. Of course, it comes in the form of the following eBay auction which is ultimately, of course, just the dejà vu of some ancient archetypal dream all over again:

Click to view eBay auction page

Of course, the purpose of this auction isn't simply to publicize the coming LA Y2K quake. I mean, like, who cares if a bridge falls on Schwarzenegger. But, more importantly, it's my hope that auctioning off the results of a cognitive process like this (albeit an ostensibly "paranormal" one), will help open the door to auctioning off all kinds of other purely cognitive tchotchkas, like moods, mental states, motivations and blackouts.

So that, one day soon, anyone will be able to auction off things like how pissed off they are at the sun, or how glad they are that X didn't Y, or that when A finally found out about B, she only told C and didn't do D or E to F or G.

Eventually, then, given the evolution of human consciousness (and how it never happens), people will be able to make 6 figure incomes just by auctioning off news of what they had for breakfast, and when, and maybe even why.

In this way, the new ideology of eBayism will have ended alienated labor and all people with internet connections will be able to survive comfortably simply by doing what they enjoy most: eating something and then talking about what they just ate till it's time to eat something else. Or vice versa.

BUSINESS
Capitalism crumbles

HIGH-TECH
Capitalism crumbles

EDUCATION
Capitalism taken a dump upon

ENTERTAINMENT
Capitalism crumbles

INTERNATIONAL
International House of Pancakes adds new pancake