Anybody remember the 500 channel information superhighway? Or the 500 channel cable system universe or whatever the fuck it was?

Well, if it ever happens, or if anybody even talks about it again, please click on our icon (available exclusively on the Mike Rosoff Network) to wake us and let us know about it.

See, we are poised and ready to roll out "Channel 501" which is a powerful and audacious and outlandish alternative to the vapid 500 channel universe of Turner Warner Malone Diller Ovitz Eisner. But until this vapor universe actually appears, we might as well take our fucking channel and go off and hibernate somewhere. So we're counting on YOU, to let us know when and if it ever does.

Oh Yeah.

You might also consider waking us when it's time to collect our "Peace Dividend" ...

... or when we can renew our driver's license at an atm machine ...

...or lower the thermostat in our Colorado mountain retreat, while space-walking outside the shuttle in earth-orbit over Borneo...