Better Faster Be$t$eller$

for the week of May 1, 1995

In an effort to speed the final and inevitable reconciliation of net-culture and pop culture, we've taken the titles from the current Publishers Weekly Be$t$eller$ lists for Hardback Fiction and so-called Non-Fiction and slammed them hard against the titles of the Publishers Weekly Bestselling Computer Books for Feb 1995.

Then we picked up the pieces and rammed them through our proprietary semantic compression algorithms, so that reading the resultant list is now the exact cognitive equivalent of reading all current hardback bestsellers and all February '95 bestselling computer books, from cover to cover, at the same time -- and with perfect comprehension and total retention.
  1. RainStarter Kit for Macintosh
    Angst-James Grisham
    Jack DeBeam Books, $239.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 1
  2. Windows for Dogs
    Darryl Gates with Darryl Strawberry
    Smirnoff Media, $239.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 1
  3. Life in a Nutshell
    Hardly Davison
    John Daniels Entertainment, $239.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 1
  4. The Dummies of Madison County
    Robert James Hahn
    James Beam Books, $239.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 1
  5. The Yellow Pages of Madison County
    Hardly Jessica Hahn
    Jim Beam Books, $239.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 1
  6. Politically Correct PCs
    Bo Diddley with Kary Mullis
    Jack Daniels Books, unpriced
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 31
  7. Years of Windows Bedtime Stories, 3rd Edition
    V. Gates and Enin
    Jack Daniels Interactive, unpriced
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 31
  8. Profecy 1-2-3 for Windows 95 3.11
    James Patterson Robertson
    Johnny Walker Gramophone Books and Tapes, $239.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 1
  9. A Dog's Guide to Word 5
    Jane Anne James
    AT&T/MCI/United Airlines Press, $2391.50
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 4447
  10. The Microsoft Glass Ladder Game: Official Strategy Guide
    Darryl, Robert, and Billy G.
    Those Wacky Gates Boys Media, $523.00
    Last Week: -- , Weeks on List: 57
  11. Correct Childrenmaker 7.5
    James James James
    General Foods/Mitsubishi Media, $523.00
    Last Week: -- , Weeks on List: 57
  12. Life 6.2 for Windows
    Bill Gates with Kathy Acker, Susan Powter, and Thomas Pynchon
    Double-Simon-Day Warner/Eckhardt, $1.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 10
  13. Windows 95 for Life
    Seinfeld with Fyodor Dostoyevsky
    QuintupleDay, $1.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 10
  14. Inside the Glass Children of Word 6
    Cher with Dostoyevsky
    Warner/Viacom/Sony/GM Books, $241.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 1
  1. Men are from Microsoft, Women are from the Yellow Pages
    Hardley Davis with Faye Resnick
    Quadrupleday, $323.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 212
  2. DOS in the Bedroom
    Sonny Bono with Walt Disney, Rupert Murdoch and Cher
    Wheeeeecom, $244.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 1
  3. Breaking Windows
    Johnny "Rotten" Malone with Samuel Beckett
    Crank House, $240.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 5
  4. How to Excel Using Death for Windows for Dummies
    Sonny, with Cher
    2.5Day & Schoooster, $1.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 1
  5. The Laws of Good and Evil in a Nutshell
    Friedrich Patterson
    ABC/CBS/NBC/Fox Books, $242.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 4
  6. Inside The First Word on System 7.5 for Windows 3.11, 5th edition
    Faye Resnick with Jackie Collins
    Psilocybin House, $239.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 15,558
  7. How to Argue with Microsoft Windows and End in Death, Every Time
    Jerry 'Please Shut the Fuck Up' Spence
    Radon House, $4239.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 49
  8. Microsoft First!
    Clifford Stolichniya
    SGI/Compuserv/Betty Crocker Media, $243.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 1
  9. First, Microsoft
    Clifford Absolut
    Netscape/General Foods Entertainment, $243.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 1
  10. Breaking the Internet
    Clifford Kamchatka
    Crystal House, $2239.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 8
  11. Using WordPerfect to Argue With Death, Every Time
    Jerry 'Please Get the Fuck Outta My TV' Spence
    Columbia/Motorola/Atari/NYNEX/Electra Books, $239.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 11
  12. How to Access the Hot Secrets of the Bible Using UNIX and Common Sense
    Jayne James DeJohn
    Cablevision/WheatChex Interactive, $239.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 11
  13. Using a Mac to Model Success, Midnight, Evil, Power and Death -- For Dummies, 3rd Edition
    Grey Gray
    MCI/Ford/PacTel/Rounder/Caroline, $239.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 11
  14. The Complete Spiritual Yellow Pages for Dummies
    Sonny Bono with Tommy Lasorda
    Gingrich/Asylum Media, $239.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 11
  15. From Beginning to Microsoft
    Cher
    Sting Media Ltd., $2239.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 8
  16. Using the Seven 1-2-3 Sisters to Garden in the End Zone
    Sting
    Cher Media, $2239.00
    Last Week: --, Weeks on List: 8

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Better Faster Be$t$eller$ is Copyright (c) 1995 by Cognitec/3rd Force Software, Inc., but may be copied or duplicated provided this copyright notice and the URL http://digimark.net/mfu/ accompanies each file or printout, and no money is charged.
Last updated: 5/01/95, 5:59 pm, by: joekay2@well.com